Here's My Opinion on Not Having an Opinion :)
"Can any single person shut the fuck up about any single thing?" - Bo Burnham (and I would imagine also God)
For most of my life, I assumed if you thought long and hard enough about any issue, you could form an opinion on it. Inspired by the marketplace of ideas, I believed that if I added enough information into my thought blender, I would get an answer. And if I happened to be smart enough and add all the right things in, I might even get the right answer. I never stopped to think about whether or not that would be a good thing. Sometime in college, I was taught/accepted that “there is no one right answer” and “we are always seeking truth.” Yet, I still felt like I was expected to have opinions on complex questions, especially when there was no accepted answer.
Opinions are good, great even. They are personal expressions, protected speech, declarations of cause. However, do we really need to have opinions on every. single. thing.? Is there not often more value in learning about a topic, considering both sides, and deciding to be undecided?
Now more than ever, we need people who authentically live and advocate for the grey areas. These people are our only hope in creating a world that cares about the “losers.” They are the ones who can point to the cracks or ambiguities or valid counterpoints with a steady voice. (I know this argument can be twisted to fit the objectives of hate groups, but it can also be the saving hope of marginalized groups. I would rather offer too much care for the undeserving than turn away the deserving.)
Here is a list of the issues I currently enjoy free floating on:
Should we replace the Electoral College? (Anytime I listen to a well-reasoned argument from either side, I’m convinced. I hate boomeranging more than not having an opinion.)
Should commercial surrogacy be legal? (Exploiting women, or empowering them?)
How should we regulate cryptocurrency? (Rather, is it a good thing for the world?)
How to balance the rights of the mother, father, and fetus during pregnancy? (I am very much pro-choice, but I think this question is still worthy of consideration in terms of policy and culture.)
I would be fine adding to this list. Actually, I hope to. I am proud to practice patience in this way — to sit with an unfinished question, rejecting the impulse to just pick a side so the discomfort is silenced. The world would be a much kinder place if we encouraged the pursuit of knowledge while also protecting the sanctity of indecision. This strategy may not directly foster action, but it does encourage positive change guided by a culture of empathy. It is not meant to be used by every person on every issue, but rather like salt: just enough that you can tell it is there. It’s not that the opinion-havers are more important than the listeners. Or that the listeners do not have value to add. Rather, it is that silence and indecision can have more benefits than their counterparts when employed thoughtfully.
I encourage you to take a few minutes and think about the topics you don’t have an opinion on. When I sat down to write this piece, I was surprised by how hard it was to come up with even four items. In the same way that I have felt empowered by taking a stance, I also felt empowered by educating myself without the need to take a stance. Though I will return to these questions many more times, I no longer feel constrained by them. I can listen and not be agitated. I can speak without needing to convince. That alone feels like an act of resistance in our current landscape of communication. That alone feels like progress.